Activity |
Response A (Excellent) |
Response B |
Response C |
A women goes into a shop (no surprise so far) and chooses 2 items and asks you which you prefer. |
You surreptitiously check out the price and then say of the cheaper one ‘That’s definitely the one for you dear’ |
They’re both equally attractive |
What dresses? |
Does this skirt make me look a bit tarty? |
No |
Yes |
You’re a bit old to worry about that aren’t you? |
A woman is going out and puts on 2 outfits and asks you to choose between the two |
I don’t know about these things. They both look fantastic (Then you can’t be blamed when she realises half way to the party she has chosen the wrong one) |
They’re both great but wear the first one for tonight |
The first one. (She will say ‘So you don’t like the other one’ and will never wear the 2nd one again and will go and buy a replacement) |
How do I look |
Beautiful |
You look good in everything |
Fine, OK, not bad, etc |
Am I getting fat? |
No, in fact I thought you’d lost a few pounds |
No |
It’s just what happens when you get older |
She is thinking of buying a handbag asks you what you think |
Mmm. I don’t think that’s quite you dear |
Mmm… the colour’s not quite right |
You’ve already got 15 handbags |
I’m turning into my mother aren’t I? |
You’re nothing like your mother. |
No |
You’ve always been like your mother |
Christmas Presents |
Jewellery |
Perfume |
Steam iron |
She gets a bit drunk at a party and asks if she has shown herself up |
No, honestly, you were the life and soul of the party |
Don’t know – I was too pissed |
No more than usual |
You pass a blond in a skimpy top and short skirt |
What does she look like? |
What blond? |
Ow – I think I’ve cricked me neck |
Does my bum look big in this? |
Of course not |
No |
Your bum looks big in everything (Unless speaking to Kim Kardishian) |
Look there’s a new romantic comedy at the Odeon. Shall we go? |
Your mate Tanya said she’d love to see it |
I’m afraid, the Odeon burned down last night |
No, unfortunately I have an appointment to have my eyeballs torn out |